Friday. Breathe out. Make ravioli, put on Sex & The City. Feet up. Computer and phone away. Sometimes I think it's crazy that this is my life at the moment. There's nothing particularly wild or extra-ordinary about it at all, it's just I am often amazed that I am where I am at the moment. I photographed a newborn, a family and commercial work this week. I run a business. I get up everyday and I work on that business. I'm three years into a law degree. How did this all happen?
See, on Wednesday I was back at my high-school working, photographing new material for promotional purposes. It was a comforting yet bizarre experience. Wandering the corridors, crossing the grounds like I would have done on so many days, so many times, years ago. Running into old teachers meant the fast paced catch up, filling them in on what I do now, how life is etc etc. What a difference five years can make, I keep thinking to myself. I can't help but remember the awful uneasy feeling I felt sitting in the Chemistry lab when I was sixteen. I was doing all the things I needed to do to get me into Medicine. But it was also around this time I got a camera and started messing around with it. Five years later and I'm back in the chemistry lab, photographing the students doing a prac. Never would I have thought that, not once. With all the doodling and scribbling in the back of the text books, never did I ponder a life of doing what I am doing now. Quite the opposite. I was confused as hell. It didn't consume me, but it felt horrible sometimes.
The whole point of this reflection is to reiterate to myself how much this week has made me realise the importance of letting things unfold. And I want to share that. Because I am certain others have felt, or do feel, the same way. I somehow got here, a place that I love, and you will too. And I know that five years from now, I'll be somewhere else. Sure, I ask lots of questions. I worry if I should be doing other things, things to speed up the process. But instead I'm trying to quieten that impatient voice and listen. I am trying to be more trusting that everything that's happening, is what needs to happen. I'll be embracing the confusion, the doubts. Voicing them because they matter, but I will not let them deter me from where I'm naturally meant to go. What I've realised is that clarity happens naturally. If you're getting up everyday and doing what you love to do, the rest will unfold.
And that's that. Have a wonderful weekend X
PS: Photo from February 2012. Honouring the old stuff.